I am deeply disturbed by a series of violent dreams that I've been having over the course of this past week. I'm not even sure what triggered them, and what they say about me, but I'm going out on a limb in blogging about my experience.
I'm not a violent person, and I would never consider acting out the violence in my dreams. It is completely out of character for me, which makes the dreams all the more upsetting.
In the dreams, my violent behavior is directed towards someone else. More specifically, I'm beating a man's head to a pulp. What's most disturbing about the whole ordeal, is the graphic nature of the violence in my dream. I can remember every gory detail, and yet there is neither blood, nor signs of a struggle. Mechanically, I pound in a man's face over and over again, until all that's left is mush.
I was scared even to mention these dreams to my husband, fearing some criticism or judgement. Not that he's insensitive; I guess I was just shifting my need to feel safe and guarded onto him. Blogging about it is a huge leap, because for the first time in a while I feel as though I'm letting my guard down a bit-which is scary.
I have this incredible sense that these dreams are symbolic, but I feel so ill equipped in trying to interpret their meanings. :(